Everybody's essential guide to IRC.... Remember.. IRC stands for "I Repeat Class" The Five Levels Of Competence: ------------------------------ Level One: The newbie -- The person who is new to irc, knows nothing, and readily admits it. Typified by asking the same question every 15 minutes because they forgot the answer from the last time they asked. Usually doesnt use an ircrc. Level Two: The Cl00b1e -- The person who has been on irc a few weeks and is firmly addicted. They usually think theyre hot stuff, even though they dont know nearly as much as they think they do. Typified by comments such as "I could run this net better then the current set of bozos" and "XXX is just a lame vanity oper" Usually runs a script pack that they dont understand. Level Three: Competence -- The person knows enough about irc to be dangerous. Usually the person is offered an O-line to keep them appeased and non-destructive. Typified by killing their friends in an attempt to impress them. Overwhelming feelings of neccesity to "get" those who they feel are their enemies. Usually runs a modified script pack that they hacked up a bit. Level Four: Disgruntled -- The person has realized that nothing that happens on irc has any bearing on anything in real life, and therefore, irc is just wasted time. If they are an irc oper, they realize they got roped into a crappy job and they curse the day they got addicted. May try to convince themselves their time on irc is useful by working on ircd trying to "fix the blasted protocol". Also typified by being over-obsessed with the future of irc, relentlessly pursuing the "bad guys" who run bots and flood. Usually runs a script pack written by someone they trust, or use their own ircrc. Level Five: Nirvana -- The person realizes that irc IS A COMPLETE FORFITURE OF EXPERIENCE AND A WASTE OF EVERYBODYS TIME! Realizes that the guy from level 2 is just a sweaty fat guy from Hoboken living in his parent's basement using a 2400 baud modem. Realizes that there is more to life then whatever fate befalls irc. Level Six: The Afterlife -- The person has realized that all time spent socializing on the computer takes away from work, home life/ girlfriend, and is more or less just boring anyhow. These people have reached the ultimate goal. THEY HAVE A LIFE. I wish to acknowledge the following people who helped me keep my sanity while wasting thousands of hours of my life on the undernet... ----------------------------- Texaco < texaco at vt dot edu > eti < tnparlo at awod dot com > Coredump < engebrec at sdstate dot edu > Cym < cym at acrux dot net > Edge < edge at saquash dot com >